Monday, July 13, 2009

The Gothia Cup Saga Continues!

The next part of the Gothia Week saga continues now! I'm glad you all liked the first part, but maybe you can be more subtle with your complements? Your ass-kissing is just going to my head now.

Anyway, moving on...

Part III: Dancing In The Rain

I was obviously really proud of myself that some blonde chick just came up to me and told me to call her. Now it's not such a surprise anymore. I miss those days. Now? Meh, I piss excellence.

I guess the Swedish like to be punctual. We reached Gothenburg at exactly 11:30 p.m. As we were waiting for our bus to arrive, I decided that I was going to do something constructive with my time. So I utilized it by being a total and complete jerk. Like, my jerk-o-meter probably reached lethal levels. I was so bored, I could try anything.

My favourite part was when I grabbed my friend's cigarette and stubbed it on a 12 year old's head. Lmao, he didn't know what hit him. :D Then, I proceeded to lambast the whole team of 14 year olds, (U-14) telling them how fucking useless they are and how their parents would be so ashamed of them when they got home, that they would be strapped down into a chair and be made to listen to Britney Spears' music. Over and over again.

Anyway, as they say, time flies when you're having fun. (:D) And so it did. Before I knew it, it'd been 30 almost minutes. Then I realized that something might be amiss. Why the hell hadn't the bus arrived yet?

We all went to the coach and made him call the authorities. It turns out, the dumbass coach had brought us to Gothenburg on the wrong f*cking day. The authorities were piiissed.

Anyhow, they agreed to send us a bus to pick us up in an hour. Great. And let me tell you people, Sweden is COLD AS FUCK.

No, I'm not kidding. It's the kind of place that hell goes to freeze over. Maybe that's where they invented Ice Tea? No wonder they've never had a war. No one gives a shit about it xD At any point of time, it's either really cold, or it's really rainy.

On this auspicious day, it was both. But of course.

To add to the misery, it was almost 12:30 a.m, and yours truly had only a light jacket to keep him warm.

So picture this: We're in the middle of nowhere - about 50 of us - and it's raining in droves. Like absolute sheets of rain driving right into your face. In addition to that, all 50 of us had atleast one suitcase and one really heavy handbag. Talk about a Scandinavian escapade!

Anyway, I had to do what I could to keep myself warm. A generous 12 year old kindly donated me his sweater. I think it's safe to say that I'm not 12 anymore.

Yeah, I know. Do I look like I care?

A couple of guys were singing some Coldplay songs completely out of tune. Viva la Vida had just come out, and they had taken it upon themselves to murder the song.


All the time shivering and shuddering in the icy rain. Picture this: Jumping into a REALLY cold swimming pool, and then coming out shivering as fuck, your breath is really fast, your body is completely tight, every muscle in your body is screaming stiff in pain.

And then you decide to sing.

That is what these guys were doing.

Anyway, the bus finally came for us about 30 minutes later than promised. I guess the Swedish are not that punctual after all. Oh well.

We soon got to the school we were staying at (all of 30 seconds away)

This was the place. The building on the front right is the school, right next to this beautiful church. Everything about that building and architecture reminds me of vampires, Dracula and Transylvania. It was awesome.

However, all that awesomeness quickly earthed into the ground, as I realized that I have to haul my 30 kilos of baggage 50 feet above the ground. Obviously the secret of the hotness of Swedish people is that they're so fit. They don't need elevators, no siree.

Goddamn, it seemed like I was out of Poseidon's den and into Satan's. Oh well, I was looking forward to a good nights sleep, especially since it was almost 2 a.m. now.

I wonder if you know about Pheidippedes or whatever his name is. The guy who ran 50 miles or something in Greece to deliver some message. When he got there, they told him to go back, lol. So he collapsed and died. Now my situation wasn't quite so grave, but the expression on my face was probably worse than his when we got to our room.

I flew 5000 miles to come here, and they give us...THIS?

Inflatable beds!

That was about the time I collapsed from exhaustion, lol.

Now, my annoying and amazing girlfriend is watching a movie that's kind of distracting me, so I'll tell you about the next part later! Stay tuned guys *Till tomorrow :D*

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